From China to Canada: A Parenting Journey of Discovery and Growth through the Family Wellbeing Program
April 16, 2025
By: Arielle Chung, Community Ambassador Interviewees: Yang and Liu, Parents from Family Wellbeing Program
We’re parents of teenagers and new to Canada from China. The Family Wellbeing Program has helped us overcome challenges in parenting here in Toronto. By sharing our story, we hope to show other parents that asking for help is a strength, not a weakness.
Yang’s Story: Rethinking My Parenting Approach and Learning to Let Go
Growing up in China, I was raised with a strong emphasis on academics. Schoolwork always came first, and anything outside of that was seen as a distraction. When I became a parent, I carried that same mindset with me.
However, when I joined the FWP, it truly opened my eyes to a whole new perspective. I realized that a child’s well-being isn’t solely about academic success. It’s about their physical health, mental well-being, emotional growth, and social development.
One of the most impactful lessons I’ve learned through the program is the importance of respecting my child’s autonomy. The program facilitator emphasized the value of respect, provided diverse resources, and empowered us to believe parents have the power to choose what works best for our family.
The workshop also helped me understand the reasons and needs behind my child’s challenging behavior, deepening my understanding of her and allowing me to respect her more.
A poem called On Children by Kahlil Gibran beautifully illustrates my approach to respecting my child’s autonomy. Children are their own individuals, with their own rights and desires. As a parent, my role is to love, support, and guide them, but I can’t control them. It’s about being there for them, giving them the space to grow, and trusting them to find their own path.
It’s not always easy for me. There moments when I still struggle with the idea of not being in control. But as I watch my child grow more confident and independent, I know that this new approach is the right one.
Liu’s Story: Transforming Struggles into Strengths
At first, I was looking for support because I was struggling with my job. But what I didn’t expect was that this support would also help me improve my relationship with my child. I realized that if I wanted relationships to change between us, I had to be the one to make that change.
One thing I really appreciated was how the FWP kept the space safe for parents to talk about our personal stories, struggles, and successes. The facilitator didn’t act like an authority. Instead, she focused on collaboration and working with us. She listened to everything we had to say, without interrupting or judging us. She respected our voices, and in every session, she made sure we had the information and resources we needed. She brought something new to each meeting that helped us face the parenting challenges we were dealing with.
I felt like my voice mattered. I didn’t feel alone. I was part of a group that understood what I was going through. Even if I wasn’t facing a particular challenge, hearing from others and offering support made me feel connected. When I heard Yang say that my sharing inspired her to make a change, it truly made me so happy. We learned from each other and worked together to find solutions.
The FWP also helped me rethink how I discipline my child. I learned that the goal of discipline isn’t to control my child, but to help them learn to control themselves. Parenting isn’t about making them do what I want. It’s about teaching them to be strong and thoughtful on their own.
As a parent, I wish I could be a comrade for my child, supporting them to be strong enough to go through the challenges in life.
A single bamboo stick can break easily, just like a parent trying to handle everything on their own. But when you have a group like we did in the workshop, it’s harder to break. The more support we have, the stronger we become. “Support for parents, from parents—supporting parents by parents.” That’s something we truly believe now.